Facing Giants

Wednesday has come and gone..........I realize it is already Thursday, rapidly approaching 2 AM. It has been just the Clay bug and me tonight.........his caregiver left around 2 and he has been so gracious and patient with me. I think he just drifted into slumber after 'chattering' in his room, in the dark with the light up stars on his ceiling......you know the ones you hold light to and then they glow for a while.......so very pretty. I just realized he has stars for his ceiling and water for his resting. We cuddled on his water bed and watched Facing the Giants video together. I looked around his room for the eagles that are posted and keeping watch. I realized a very small eagle was embroidered on his shirt.......he found it amusing. Clay finds so many things amusing; his wit keen and quick. The scripture just outside his door from Isaiah 40 and the eagle flying confident and free. He noticed tears in my eyes as the movie ended and he simply gave me that all knowing grin and gazed at me with eyes that seem as deep as the ocean and as vast in wisdom. The if onlys .... if only Clay could talk, if only Clay could sit up, if only Clay could walk........if onlys. If only Clay could express the depths of his understanding and love of Jesus. We know it is in him......we know it is him......the journeys angels carried him safely as a newborn to overcome the pain and to face the giants of severe medical obstacles and death. He remembers and it shines through his countenance, his jubilant spirit, his humor. How I wish he could 'explain' it to me in a greater manner yet I also know that God only allows Clay to teach us certain things at certain times to certain extents. Just now I try to find words to express my gratitude for tonight's time out for this tired mama and enlightened adult, totally dependent son. I try to find words to thank God for the might of the eagle in the face of giants.